Please Leave a Message At the Beep…Beep!
Hello…you have reached my motherfucking phone that is fucking missing. Until I find my motherfucking phone or get a fucking replacement you will have to reach me at my spoiled son’s cell phone. Please try to wish the fucking phone back to me because I don’t want to pay the motherfucking deductible and I’m tired of hearing my son whine about when will he get his damned phone back. Don’t bother leaving a fucking message…
This is The Boy and you have reached my cell phone for emergency use only. If you are trying to reach my mom you can call her on her cell phone again…all the wishing brought it back to her. Thank goodness. Her phone number is XXX-XXX-XXXX. If you are calling me…I’m probably in school…duh…and can’t answer the phone. If this is M——- B. or M—–, can you call me right back?
Hello…my cell phone is back safely in my possession. All the wishing it back to me must have worked. I can’t come to the phone right now because I am currently enjoying some quality time with my phone…probably watching Alexander Graham Bell & The Astonishing Telephone on The History Channel. Please leave a message and I will get back to you as soon as I can…Oh, and M——- B and M—–, please don’t call my son’s phone looking for me until after I remove the pictures of our cleavage that show up when you call that are still on the phone from when it was mine!
